What would you tell your younger you?
Would it be a big discussion about how you were?
Or would it be small bullet points to just get them through.
Realistically, we can't tell our younger selves anything, but we can reflect up on those moments & remind ourselves that we have grown & changed with time & experiences.
But for fun, let's do it.
I will tell younger Karen.....
Not To Get So Wound Up By Presentation:
I was obsessed with the way our home looked.
Perfect, clean & nothing out of place.
Or how the trailer was.
Clean, meticulous, no dirt.
I was even crazy about how the kids dressed.
I wasn't like a mad woman who would lose her banana's if the kids didn't match their outfits, but I certainly did have a hard time about it.
I know looking back this, I just was trying to control things in my world. I had little to no control over my life as a youngster & teen, that it was very important for me to have that. It was also about perception. I wanted to be perceived as a perfect wife & mother. Because I was a young mom, there were many times I was shamed & even belittled. Worrying about how people thought a young mom was, motivated me to make sure no one ever thought I was a careless mom.
I am not sure why it was so very important to me, that I thought this way. I realize now that young moms are no different than any other age mom.
But as my younger self, I was determined to be seen as capable.
The house, & kids possibly took away from our life experiences as a family because I was so very distracted.
Another One Would Be; To Not Ever Try Smoking:
Everyone that knows me, knows that I am a smoker.
Yes I need to quit.
Yes I need to move past it.
But as I have mentioned before, & I will again, do not have regrets. They truly make you who you are.
However, I have only one regret where I know I should have not done it & would not have changed the outcome of my life. Smoking.
I would tell that teen Karen, not to take it, not to touch it & to walk away.
I am not sure she would have listened to me as she (I) was super rebellious at that point in my life, but I would have told her.
I love smoking, I do!
I feel like it is a part of me. Kinda like someone saying 'Oh Karen is outgoing, fun, loving & a smoker'.
I know it can't be a personality trait, but let me tell you, I feel it is.
But it truly is the one regret I have in my life.
I would have screamed NO at younger me.
So the adult me has to keep trying to quit.....which I am.
Last One: Love Yourself:
I didn't get this when I was younger.
I am okay now, but when I was a kid-let....not a chance.
I had a mother with poor self-esteem & both parents did not build us up to feel confident in how we looked or who we were.
So I did not have the ability to love & hold myself to a high standard.
I searched for love in all the wrong places.
I even wished & were jealous of people who had love in their families.
I was not blessed in finding a mother (role) to replace the one that I lacked.
I had no love for me.
It wasn't until years & years later that I was like; 'Hey, I am pretty, I am a decent person.'
I would have told her to worry about her, & love is within her.
I could add more, but maybe another day & another post.
But what I will tell you now is that:
The house is clean-ish, & I don't care what my kids wear.
I still think about quitting everyday, and one day I will & shock you all!!
And I am okay with the person I am today, in fact I like her.
What are yours?
There has to be things that you would tell that younger you.
You wouldn't be the amazing person you are today without the younger years, but there had to be things that you should have or wanted to do that didn't turn out the way you planned.
What would you say about it now???